sorry i need a vent

every day is the same and i just don't know how much longer i can go on like this.
I wake up and my head feels like it is either filled with concrete or helium and my eyes are going to pop out of my head until i am violently sick. this becomes bearable throughout the day. then around mid afternoon i am overcome with drowsiness so much so i have been known to fall asleep mid sentence. when i wake up 2 hours later the process of the morning starts again except more intense pain in the eyes. as the evening comes and it comes to bedtime i can not settle at first if i lay down i feel sick and my head starts to pulsate if i prop myself up after a while i get this intense sharp pain under my shoulder blade running up my spine through my neck and into the base of my head which then does not go away. when i finely do fall asleep i wake up every 2 hours throughout the night, and then it all starts again. oh and that is not mentioning the fact that all the time there is an incessant ringing in my ears with the occasional whooshing noise when it gets real bad. these are the symptoms that i get every day, don't get me wrong i have a lot more symptoms but these are the symptoms that do not give me a day off and this is how i feel on a good day.

more weard stuff

i woke up to go to the loo this morning and as i was about to get back into bet i passed out again landing accross my boyfriends legs. then as i was trying to read a few hours later i had to close one eye to read as when i looked out of both i was seeing double.

weigh in

well i am still passing out and my head is still thumping. The other day, i landed on my wrist funny so ended up at A&E when i told them what had happened they seemed more interested in the "Drop Attack" (as they called it) then my wrist or cheek finally they told me they would x-ray my wrist but i would have to speak to my neuro about the "Drop Attacks" as they believed it to be neurological (like i had told them when i first got there i was not there for the passing out i was there for my wrist.) and there was nothing they could do for the drop attacks so i should not do anything like cross the road or go swimming or cook unsupervised you know anything that could kill me or others if i pass out whilst doing it (it's a good job i can't drive). oh luckily it was just a sprain no brake on my wrist.

that was Thursday i had had on before that on Tuesday and after it on Saturday after I got out of the bath.

so far this week touch wood i have not yet had one but it is only Tuesday afternoon and i do feel like i have been sucking on a helium balloon so you never know i think i should spend the rest of the day at my boyfriends mums just in case.

on a lighter subject i weighed in yesterday at 14st 2lb which means we are back on track any loss from this point onwards is a proper loss for the challenge whoopy

weigh in

well i weighed in at 14st 4lb that is a lose of 2 lb so i am on my way back down 2 more lb and i am back on track. since last week things have not been good i have been passing out every other day and the headaches are getting more and more intense i have given up on taking pain relief as when i do take them they do nothing the only drugs i am taking are the topamax, the thyroxin and some anti sickness if i can take them in time.

that morning feeling

well again i am awake after 5 hours of restless sleep if you can call it sleep i would call it laying in bed trying to get comfortable only to get snatches of unconsciousness until i could take it no longer. my head feels full of helium today i know this feeling i would get this feeling a lot before i started the started taking the diamox or the topamax i know tonight i am in for a bumpy ride and it is not migraine but we shall see. i think this is what some of the girls on the haven mean when they say that it takes a long time but you learn the difference between the feeling of high pressure and migraine. i have not had this expanding head sensation since the lumbar puncture. it is the exact feeling you get when you are on gas and air and i hate it. don't get me wrong the first time it happened i thought it was fascinating quite a buzz until the headache started and i passed out and every thing started to flicker like the light bulb is about to blow constantly and then it didn't go away they that pressure builds up so much that you'r sick.

more weirdness

so i was in the kitchen talking to my mum when suddenly i loose all the fealing in my right leg and my right arm starts to twitch like mad. i mean odd ha? one minuet i am standing there and the next i am on the floor and my leg has properly gone to sleep. assume it is a migraine it lasted 1 and 1/2 hours. i am just gonna make a note of all this weird stuff now and take it with me to my next appointment rather then panicking and calling the hospital every 5 minuets or i will be told to come in and then sent home once the have pumped me with what ever steroid they think will help and i don't want to end up loosing this challenge. so this blog is now going to log my symptom changes

pain

ok so i woke up today and i felt like i had done 10 rounds with Tyson. my face is puffy my right eye is slightly bigger then my left and the ringing in my ears is so loud it is drowning out the hum of my pc. is this a migraine or is it IH i don't know any more the neuro says migraine now but surly if it was migraine i would get a day off from this pain and the insistent clamour in my ears. last night i managed to get about 4 hours sleep, i just cant get comfortable any more. if i lay too flat my head hurts more, if i sit up i get a stiff neck and back ache. my joints are hurting so much now of a night it is stupid i just don't know what to do any more.

been a while

i know it has been a while, i have had some stuff going on. well i was getting these odd visual thing of a night where anything that moved had a trail behind it and i was having these odd fits in which apparently i would zone out and have no knowledge of it after and i was getting slower and slower in everything i did. my neuro took me off the diamox saying that it is a side effect of both my meds but the topamax treats both migraine and IH and the diamox just tends to treat the IH and as my discs are normal at the mo and my lp was only 25 he thinks that my pressure is down for now.

so i was off the diamox for a week and then it started on sat i was angry at everyone my head was pounding my ears were extra sensitive to sound and i could not take my sunglasses off the light was so painful. when i woke up Sunday morning it looked like it was snowing twinkly lights and i was finding it difficult to speak (i sounded drunk) my mum rang Queen Mary's Hospital as that is where my neuro is based and they do not have an a&e so she rang Kings Collage Hospital as that is where i when for my lp and the last time i went to my local a&e they did not have a clue when it came to ih and wanted to treat me for meningitis when i had low pressure after my lp cos they didn't have a neuro on call.

so we went to King's. by the time we got there i sounded like i was having a stroke i could not form a whole word let alone a sentence. after tests and anti sickness meds the neuro told me it was a severe migraine and dosed me up with steroids and pain meds i am dredding next weeks weigh in. it took till wed to get my speech back and then today i passed out so i have another migraine on the way if the neuros are wright and this is all migraine now they are lasting for 4 days and i am getting an other one as soon as i get over the last each time.